The Basics of How to Make a Long-Distance Relationship Work
Now that you have found someone whom you genuinely click with, you probably don’t want a long-distance love to end just because you live in different states. Research shows that individuals in long-distance relationships have comparable or greater levels of intimacy, strong communication, and satisfaction, proving that healthy, stable relationships are still possible.
But we totally get your doubts and frustrations on how to make a long-distance relationship work. Maintaining this type of relationship is difficult because it requires more thought and effort to ensure that you and your partner continue to feel connected despite the distance.
If you’re pondering on the question of “Can long-distance relationships work,” we’re here to provide you with some LDR relationship tips to assuage your fears.
How Do You Maintain Love From a Distance?
For long-distance relationships to succeed, the people involved need to be more deliberate and diligent in doing the work, such as:
Make Phone Calls Often
While maintaining communication is crucial in long-distance relationships, don’t limit yourself to texting. So many things can get lost in translation that way, and you’d want to avoid that as much as possible. Set aside times to have in-depth conversations where you can hear each other’s voices and see your faces.
Check-in with each other in the morning before going to work and again before going to bed. This way, you feel like you are a part of each other’s days even though you are not physically together.
Make as Many Visits as You Can to One Another
We’re aware that the distance and associated expenses may make this difficult, but it’s crucial that you see each other as much as possible. Long-distance relationships don’t have to be this way permanently. Whether you do it quarterly or monthly, just choose what’s most effective for you both.
Always know when you’re going to see each other. Setting a specific date gives you both something to look forward to, which improves the optimism in your relationship.
Be Truthful About How You Feel
It’s often easy to keep your feelings hidden, especially if your partner is not physically present or if you’re afraid to make things uncomfortable. But we highly suggest that you push yourself to be open with one another. Don’t shy away from difficult conversations.
The more you consider it a difficult topic, the more you should discuss it. Listen to and express your emotions. You are in this together with your partner.
Be Trusting of One Another
Maintaining the boundaries of a long-distance relationship requires mutual trust. This is true for all types of relationships, of course, but it’s even more important in ones where you have no way of confirming whether your partner is doing what they claim to be doing.
It’s normal to be concerned when you observe changes in your partner’s behavior but try not to draw hasty judgments. They could just be having a bad day, catching up with friends, or running personal errands.
Make a Romantic Gesture with Gifts
When you aren’t physically together, it’s worthwhile to show your thoughtfulness in creative ways. If you know she would love some treats for her sweet tooth, get them delivered to her. You can also have some food delivered to her door if you know she hasn’t been feeling well, just like you would if you were there to tend to her needs.
Doing this makes them feel special and appreciated, which is a great way to improve your relationship. It also shows how well you know your partner.
Harsh Realities About Long-Distance Relationships
Yes, LDRs can be successful, but they also have a bad reputation. Despite the best efforts to romanticize such relationships, many are unaware of these 3 harsh facts about long-distance relationships:
Increased Feelings of Insecurity
Your mind can run wild when you’re separated from your partner. The thought of them spending more time with others or straying with a possible new lover may flood your mind. This, in turn, can make you feel more insecure, going beyond acceptable limits of respecting your partner’s privacy or individuality.
Soothe yourself and regulate your emotions first before initiating an honest conversation with your partner. When your emotions take over, words that aren’t suited for the conversation can slip through, which leads to more strife.
Prone to Betrayal or Infidelity
Long-distance relationships are prone to betrayal. You have no idea what your partner’s actual activities and intentions are. Your relationship may be at an all-time low in terms of communication and your partner may be gradually losing interest. It is extremely painful for one to be trying to maintain a relationship while the other is no longer interested in doing their share.
When your gut is telling you something is off, discuss it with your partner. Tell them about the things you’ve observed and how these made you feel. However, end the relationship right away if there is already obvious proof of cheating, such as if you witnessed them exchanging intimate messages with someone else.
Growing Bored With the Relationship
LDRs have the drawback of causing a void in your partnership. It can get boring for both of you if you have to constantly update and reassure each other. The distance caused by different time zones also makes it hard to communicate.
For example, your partner may become busy during the time you have set aside to catch up, which can occasionally cause you to become irritated and progressively lose interest in the relationship.
For this reason, you should not restrict yourself to the standard calls and texts. Browse through apps that could add some fun and spice to your relationship. Prime examples of these apps would be Couply, Cupla, Agape, Gottman Card Decks, and Gyft.
Regardless of how to make a long-distance relationship work, it is important to make an effort to be more present and cherish each moment with your partner. That holds true whether you are interacting virtually or in person.
Starting a long-distance relationship for the first time can be intimidating. But it doesn’t always have to be the case. As long as you can weigh both pros and cons, you should be able to decide whether or not you are genuinely suited for this kind of relationship.
Reference
Fournier, A.B. (2023). “Can Long Distance Relationships Work?”. VeryWell Mind.
https://www.verywellmind.com/long-distance-relationships-can-they-work-4174038#:~:text=After%20these%20challenges%2C%20being%20happy,3
